New year, new start, new me!

Wow... it's not only already 2010, but the 1st month of it is nearly gone already! Where does the time go?? So much has happened these past few months... so much to reflect on. Ryan and I split up again around Thanksgiving last year, this time for good. Looking back, I can't believe that I put up with all that I did, and for so long. I just wanted so badly to believe in him, and to give him enough time for God to have a chance to work on his heart before I just gave up. I think I did that, maybe I even gave him too much time... too many chances. I regret that I let Ryan hurt my kids. They still miss him, and Trizten rarely even gets to see him.

Aside from the drama, Christmas was wonderful! The kids spent Christmas Eve with their dad and his parents, and then we spent Christmas day with my parents. Trizten had a very blessed 1st Christmas, even though his daddy never even asked to see him. New years was rung in with friends and the baby, while the kids spent the night with grandparents. I got exciting news that evening... one of my very best friends found out she's pregnant!!!

Since my split with Ryan, or even before that I guess, God has really been dealing with me about some things in my life, and I've been seeking Him a lot more. I feel like I've grown so much in my faith this past year since I began to attend a different church than the one I grew up in. I switched because my old church just wasn't feeding me at all anymore, and my beliefs had changed over the years to the point that I disagreed with half the sermons preached there! I still love my old church and the people there are like family, but the worship and the messages I am hearing at my new one are just what I needed to be revived! I have a much closer walk with the Lord now, and I'm so happy that I decided to try something new. God is, as always... so good. He has gotten me through yet another year full of heartache, and managed to bless me threw it all. Sometimes I think, God... I can't take any more, this is as much as I can bare, but He knows our limits better than we do, and pushes us farther than we ever thought we could go. He promised to never give us more than we can handle! He gives us strength to bare all things, and hope to look forward to the future. He is a God of new beginnings and 2nd (and 3rd and 4th...) chances, always willing to forgive us and help us move on to bigger and better blessings. I am looking forward to the rest of this year, I can't wait to see what He has in store for me and my kids!!